look inside - who do you tell yourself you are?
Midlife often brings with it a profound period of introspection, a time when we begin to question the identities and roles that have defined us for years. The successful professional, the devoted parent, the supportive partner — these roles may have brought meaning and fulfilment, but they can also start to feel restricting as we long for something more.
Letting go of these deeply ingrained identities can be daunting. However we’ve done it many times already in our lives – I’m guessing you no longer identify as a toddler!
There can be complex emotions like loss, uncertainty, and even guilt. However, as author Tara Mohr wisely reminds us in her book Playing Big, “We are constantly growing, and to grow into who we’re meant to become, we must release the outdated versions of ourselves that are holding us back.”
REwrite your stories
From a young age, we’ve built a story about who we are. These stories, influenced by family, and the society we grew up in. Sometimes, they can also trap us – people like us don’t …., you’ll be successful if fit.
As Brené Brown explains, “Our brain is wired for storytelling, and sometimes we hold on to stories that limit our potential because they feel familiar and safe.”
Midlife is the perfect time to challenge these old narratives and rewrite them to reflect the person you are and want to be
Practical steps to embracing change
Letting go of old roles is a journey that requires patience, self-compassion, and intentional action. Here are some steps to guide you through this transition:
- Acknowledge the roles you’re releasing. Name the identities that you feel ready to let go of. This awareness is the first step towards creating space for something new.
- Examine the stories you’ve been telling yourself. Reflect where they came from and who gave them to you. Are they empowering or limiting? Rewrite them to reflect the wiser and more experienced person you are today.
- Celebrate the lessons learned. Honour the experiences and wisdom gained from these old roles. They might be excruciating – its done, all you can do is learn. Appreciate what they have taught you about yourself and the world.
- Visualise your next chapter. Imagine the person you are becoming. What new roles and identities excite you? Visualisation can be a powerful tool in manifesting your desired future. Create a mood board!
- Practice self-compassion. Be kind to yourself as you navigate this process. Change can be challenging, and you will experience a range of emotions. If you aren’t , question why?
Remember: Letting go is not about discarding your past; it’s used the life lessons and wisdom learned along the way to create the life you’d like.
By shedding old identities and embracing change, you open yourself up to new possibilities, deeper fulfilment, and a more authentic expression of who you truly are.
